How I Ended Up Surviving the Shame That Was Never Mine to Carry
This post is about surviving the shame that was never mine to carry — and learning how to finally put it down.
Out of everything they took, the one thing they made sure to leave behind was shame.
That thick, suffocating, soul-crushing weight I carried like a second skin.
They hurt me.
They lied.
They touched what wasn’t theirs.
They manipulated.
They silenced.
They turned their backs when I needed them most.
And somehow I was the one left feeling dirty.
Like I was the problem.
Like I was too much, too broken, too complicated, too loud.
Like I should’ve been stronger.
Should’ve fought harder.
Should’ve known better.
Should’ve stayed quiet.
The Lies They Taught Me to Believe
Surviving the shame that was never mine to carry means untangling your identity from the lies they fed you.
It means realizing the guilt was theirs — not yours.
It means learning that silence wasn’t consent, and survival isn’t weakness.
They wanted me to believe I was tainted.
That my worth was ruined.
That no one would love me if they knew the truth.
That I should protect their image, their reputation, their legacy — instead of protecting myself.
But now?
Now I’m done carrying what they dumped on me.
Now I’m done letting their sins wear my name.
This shame doesn’t belong to me.
Releasing the Weight They Left Behind
Not the shame of being abused.
Not the shame of staying silent.
Not the shame of struggling to parent through pain.
Not the shame of still healing.
Not the shame of fighting for my life when everyone else just watched.
Surviving the shame that was never mine to carry means speaking it.
Writing it.
Dragging it into the light.
Because shame only survives in silence.
And I’m done staying quiet.
This Shame Was Never Mine
If you’ve been carrying shame that wasn’t yours —
That was projected onto you, forced onto you, programmed into you —
You have every right to drop it.
Right here.
Right now.
Say it out loud with me:
“This is not mine.”
“It never was.”
“And I refuse to carry it another day.”
Because the truth is:
I’m not shameful.
I’m sacred.
And no amount of trauma will ever change that.
